A wolf in sheep’s clothing

Someone came to help with the roof. Two men, Miles and Larry, they said they would help with the roof. Come back once you have sent a work timetable and schedule via email, we said. R gave them his email and they walked off.

In truth, we thought nothing of it when we heard nothing. We have had about ten people look at the roof and no one wants to touch it. We simply got on with our lives.

R and I are currently both students so we don’t have to rise particularly early. That means of course that when we hear banging on that particular morning it takes a few minutes to realise it sounds awfully close.

“Is that next door?” I ask.

“Not sure,” he says, getting out of bed and putting on his dressing gown.

Next minute I hear him yelling something like “Gosh darn it, what in goodness hell are you doing to our roof”? only with far richer vocabulary.

At this point I am awake and throwing clothes on. I put my head into the spare room and see people on the roof. Miles and Larry are there but also two others, – and, more importantly, they are ripping apart a skylight.

“Who?” I stumble.

“Don’t you worry, missus”, says Miles. “I’ve got you some good boys. They know what they’re doing. Don’t you boys”?

“That’s right”, the young stranger says. “We have been contracted to do your roof.”

I look from him to R. who has a face like thunder and what happens next shows how trusting we are, despite Simon Landry and Mumbles Construction.

“Don’t worry, we’re a proper firm”. His name is Jay and he says it with a smile.

“So do you have the skills to do this”?

“Yeah, no problem. We’ll fix this mess,” he says. “I can see you have been left in a state but we can honestly sort this all out.”

I question them and they point to their reviews, four stars and five stars. R looks at me and we have a quick talk. As the skylight is already off, we decide to go with it, more in hope than confidence.

“Okay,” I say, “If you’re sure you know what you are doing?”

“Oh yes,” says Jay earnestly.

“Promise?” I ask, and I know my autism is showing so badly.

“Yes, we’ve just been brought off doing a woman’s barn roof in Carmarthen to do this.”

So, we let them. We take their details and check the ratings and… yes, we let them “sort” it.

This is where I get angry, because that man, Jay, looked me in the eye and said there would not be any problems and that he knew what he was doing. R was less impressed and went off to photograph their van and search for more info.

They lowered the skylights and ripped apart a panel we had left over, basically using up a lot of our resources, both wood and metal sheeting.

“That’s crooked,” our neighbour said and we looked. It was the second day and they were more cavalier than on the first. Something was wrong and they were short with us. The cladding they had placed on the upstand for the flat roof was not straight. R and I are both neurodivergent, so it was grinding our gears and I remember leaning toward him and saying “We can fix that, right”?

Even then I was thinking about how we were going to fix what should be a fix.

Miles and Larry had already taken half the money – saying they would not be back unless we gave them an interim payment. R went toe to toe with him and had wrangled him down to half payment. Miles then paid Jay and his mate. Then it started to go pear shaped by the middle of day two.

Did it help? Did they save the day and fix our roof so we can paint and get on with life?

No, the problems are unchanged. We are in the same situation. The drips are still coming in and we still have buckets.

Did we pay? Yes, but when Miles took that payment he left Jay and his friend as on the job to go get materials. Of course that was the last we saw of Miles and Larry/Lewis Cash, – and Jay never got paid for the second day, at least he says he hasn’t. If they had made a good job we would be singing their praises but after they had gone we went and had a look. No way had they proved the job properly with a pressure washer. Lumpy mastic with holes and screws into expanding foam. The skylights sealed shut or fouled with metal sheet. A total mess, with shit all over the roof. We might just as well have burnt that money.

So, Jay… If you are out there, you and your Green Oaks company are no better than Simon Landry and Mumbles Construction.

When he asked if Miles and Larry had come back, Jay assured us by WhatsApp that he’s stand by us, maybe invoking his insurance but now we’ve sent him a picture of the incoming water and collapsed ceiling, he’s just walked away. So my conclusion? Don’t use him! Not for skylights, nor for any windows and really don’t believe him when he says they can do something, because they come across to me like incompetent liars.