Life

What rules do you follow?

Do you have a code of conduct?

Do you wave at strangers just to make them smile?

I do. And most wave back. I smile when I can.

I am as kind as possible, in fact most class it as one of my faults. I trust too fast and fall hard when people let me down. I can be over-exuberant and sometimes hurtful because of it. It is never intentional. You see I am driven by a need to be liked, which means that I can sometimes seem over the top. But at the same time I am also fear others.

I worry that I will get hurt. So every time I trust I have to climb a mountain over the problem. Most don’t notice. It is all done in a second, that pause before I smile and start talking. Do I appear distant? Well, maybe I am just not sure of myself, maybe I am lacking in confidence. Meet me on a day I am happy and all is right with the world, I will be more ‘normal’.

So, no matter what, I live by the code of not knowingly hurting people. I try to make others lives easier if I can. Of course, that can mean I end up doing more work than I ought. Still I wouldn’t change me.

Lately though I’ve also had to include a new rule – to say no.

It’s a tough one. I don’t do it unless I can help it. But I have to now. What with my nut allergy I have to say no. But it is hard, especially with cakes. I love cake. Now I don’t get a lot of cake unless I’ve made it. I miss cake.

This rather rambling post was inspired by the daily prompt – I walk the line.